My dear friends
In the going, God still molds me every day and irons out the creases. When I think:
"Okay, we are done for now!" Then there is something completely new on my plate. It's not always easy handling it in a mature way when my flesh wants to throw a tantrum like a toddler on steroids on the inside! It takes time. And my flesh wanted it like yesterday. One day I ace it, the next day I stumble. Repent and stand up again, and in the going, there is growth! Growing is often slow and painful and often I choose to run the other way and not to grow by going through the fire of sanctification.
When we started our journey, I looked for stories about how moms cope with juggling kids, missionary work, housework, cooking, and schooling. I also met a lot of encouraging iron moms with ideas and advice on what works for them. My conclusion was that everyone's journey looks different and each one has to find her own pace with the Holy Spirit. Honestly, most days I look back and don't know how I got through the day. And that is the testimony, not in myself but through Christ in me! We encounter many interesting people on our journey. Believers, non-believers, and people searching, and from each one, we learn something. Recently, we met a few random people, who professed Jesus, quoting scriptures and speaking knowledgeable about the things of God. One can so easily assume it's a family member in Christ and we let our guard down. It became clear to us that the wolf in sheep's clothing was getting craftier. It was not an easy pill to digest, but at the same time, I felt God saying: "You are eager to go preach the gospel to the unreached, cross borders and go to the ends of the earth, but who will go to your neighbor stuck in sin because of a trauma? Who will go set those captives free that others treat with disgust? The outcasts? The "scary"? The "don't tread there" people?" Every opportunity and every encounter is a chance to grow. I also had to accept that as a human being, I fail. I can only trust God to pick up where I lack. I just need the faith of a mustard seed. God will do the rest!
Therefore, my dear brothers and sisters, stand firm. Let nothing move you. Always give yourselves fully to the work of the Lord, because you know that your labor in the Lord is not in vain.
1 Corinthians 15:58
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